full
empty

and there was nothing.
nothing left in the end.


introduction
confession

zishing
04-12-1992
no preferences
nothing particular.
the place people come to for help.
and that's about it.


out
in

AB
AiPing
Amos
Andy
Baka-Tsuki
Caroline
ChinHian
Dom
De-Coder's Cafe a.k.a.Yap
Hisyam
JingSheng
LeeYang
Kee
Leonard
LiJie
MarcusChan
Matilda
Max
MelWeh
RongRong
RuiFen
Sarah
SiHui
Stewart
Sumo
Valerie
Zak


past
present

August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 May 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 February 2011 April 2011 September 2011 November 2011

thank
request

designer: frozen.d}
resources: x


(Monday, December 31, 2007/10:57 AM)

conclusion
and so we end this year with a beautiful morning.

i sent some deserving people my message for this year.
not the the rest are undeserving but.
oh well. i'll give you a different message since you take the effort to come here.

personality is a hard thing to change.
once you are able to act out your personality most of the time it will stay like that.
along with all the habits you possess.
and we know that habits are hard to lose/change.
same with personality.

yesterday my parents brought me to year end talk by the same monk.
i was sitting outside the hall on a chair and listening.
his style is the same. he tells some stories and everyone laughs.
and there was not 1 hall there were 4.
and if i was sitting outside. you know what that would mean.

so after it was over. i wanted to ask a question.
"you're quite good at making people laugh. you should be a stand-up comedian
so why a monk. you try to share the word but talk after talk i come i find the same people
and they don't change at all.
so why?"
he explained why he was talking yesterday.

but i don't think anyone who went there will remember now.
even after 1/2 hour i ask my family and they're all blank.
so much for understanding more than me.
people's minds are filled more with the need to eat.

i guess this is what the world has become.
but today is today.
what we do cannot be reversed.
there is only a small hope that maybe.
maybe some people will change.

and it's really small.
and the people who do this have no one to lean on.
besides being provided food, travel and accommodation.
you'd think the only person they can ask for help. and very little. is an elder of more experience.

yet all these people come.
come to them for blessing. for "words of wisdom.
they just come. free of charge. to what?
pour all their selfish sorrow away by listening to his so-called jokes.
seriously i think 3 out of the 4 halls don't actually belong there.

they don't.
like go pay for your own psychological help.
go pay for your own stand-up comedian.
don't use a monk as entertainment.
get a life.

so my mother says maybe he's doing this for the popularity.
if he was then i pity him.
because he has to make a thousand/ a few thousand people all laugh.
just so that he can be popular.
after all that training and shaving your head and whatnot.

isn't it more practical to be a stand-up comedian?
but no. if you wear a robe then more people will come to you?
that appears to be the case. but logically speaking.
you don't get money. you don't get to do alot of things.
therefore i guess he cannot be doing this for himself.
what kind of freak wants attention from thousands of people for no money at that kind of age?

i don't think an adult will be so mentally degraded.
even i can think better than that. even you can.
and i suppose therefore he can do better than me as well.
so there you go it's not possible.

before i went out i was reading something about lateral thinking.
the question went like this:
In 2 hours 2 men dig a hole 5 feet deep. How deep a hole can 10 men dig in 2 hours?

Of course 25 feet is the answer. but no. there are many other factors you didn't consider.

1) 10 men need a wider space so they will dig the hole wider as well. so it's shallower.
2) some of the men might be stronger and therefore dig harder. other men might be weaker and dig slower.
3) water could fill up the hole and since it's wider now the digging will be unable to continue pretty quickly.
4) it is possible that with more people working on a project, each person may become less efficient due to increased opportunity for distraction, the assumption he can slack off, more people to talk to, etc.
5) so on and so forth.

so what i just did up there was lateral thinking.
i hope i didn't make your new year too boring but.

thank you if you bothered to read up to here.
hopefully you too can move forward next year.

because we cannot go back to what has been done.
only move forward.


...


thankyou.
and have a great year ahead.